Supper for one
Eating dinner alone every night is common, it does no harm on its own, and plenty of people enjoy it. It gets hard when supper shrinks to crackers at the counter because nobody else is coming. This page covers how to make a meal for one feel like a meal, how to cook for one without fuss, and how to share a table with other people now and then.
Eating alone every night, and when it wears on you
Eating dinner alone every night is common, and on its own it does no harm. Lots of people live alone, and lots of them like a calm supper with a book or the news. The trouble starts when the meal turns into a chore you rush through, or when supper is the hour you miss someone most. A little care for the meal, and a shared table once in a while, usually makes the evenings easier.
Picture an ordinary weeknight. It’s six o’clock, the kitchen light is on, and you’re eating crackers and a slice of cheese over the sink because a whole meal for one feels silly. The TV is talking in the other room. 10 minutes later supper is over, and the longest part of the evening is still ahead of you.
Many people who eat alone most nights slip into that pattern without choosing it. They skip meals, snack instead of cooking, or eat the same three foods on rotation. None of it is a moral failing. Cooking and eating were often shared jobs for years, and when the other person is gone, the reason to bother can go with them.
This page is about the meal. If the whole evening after supper is the hard part, long evenings at home covers that stretch, and Sunday has ideas for the longest afternoon of the week.
Make the meal worth setting the table for
The simplest change is also the one people resist most: set a place for yourself. Put down a placemat, a real plate, a cloth napkin if you have one, and a proper glass for your water or milk. Turn on the lamp over the table. It takes two minutes, and it tells you that supper has started and that you’re worth the effort.
If the empty chair across from you is hard to look at, move. Take the other seat, eat at the end of the table, or set up a small table by the window where you can watch the street. Some people put a vase of grocery-store flowers where the other plate used to go. Others prop up a library book, the newspaper, or a crossword, which gives the eyes a place to land and keeps the meal from feeling like waiting.
Sound helps too. Many people turn on the radio at suppertime, because voices talking or a ballgame on in the background make the room feel less empty than the TV in the next room does. Music you used to play at dinner parties can be lovely, or it can sting, so pick the station or album that feels good this week.
Try to eat at about the same time each night. A set suppertime gives the evening a center and keeps you from grazing until nine. When the meal is done, wash the plate and put it away, so the kitchen is ready for tomorrow and the evening can move on.
Cooking for one without the fuss
Most recipes feed four, and most packages at the store are sized for a family, so cooking for one can feel like a losing battle. A few habits make it easier.
Cook once and eat twice. Make a pot of soup, chili, or stew on a Sunday, eat a bowl that night, and freeze the rest in one-serving portions. Label each container with a strip of masking tape and the date. On a tired Wednesday, a bowl from the freezer is a real supper in the time it takes to warm it.
Buy small on purpose. The deli and meat counters will sell you one chicken breast, two pork chops, or a quarter pound of sliced turkey. Frozen vegetables keep for months and come out of the bag one handful at a time. Eggs, canned beans, canned fish, rice, pasta, and a loaf of bread kept in the freezer let you put together a meal without a trip to the store.
Keep a short list of suppers you can make on a low night, and tape it inside a cupboard door. Yours might include scrambled eggs with toast and a sliced tomato, a baked potato with cheese and leftover broccoli, or canned soup with a grilled cheese sandwich. Pasta with jarred sauce and a handful of frozen spinach stirred in takes 15 minutes. A sheet pan of chicken thighs and chopped vegetables, roasted together, gives you two or three meals from one pan.
Once a week, if you feel up to it, try one new recipe. It gives you a small project, a reason to go to the store, and a topic for the next phone call. Cookbooks and websites for one or two people are easy to find at the library.
If cooking has gotten hard because of your health, your energy, or your hands, there’s help. Many communities have home-delivered meal programs, often called Meals on Wheels, for older adults who have trouble shopping or cooking. The Eldercare Locator, a free public service, can point you to programs near you at 1-800-677-1116. Volunteers who bring the meals often stop for a short chat, which is its own kind of company.
When supper belonged to someone you lost
For many people, supper was the hour they shared with one person. You cooked, they set the table, and you told each other about the day. After a death or a divorce, that hour can be the hardest of the whole day, because the routine is still there and the person isn’t.
You may still be cooking for two out of habit, or you may have stopped cooking at all. Both are common. Some people find comfort in making a dish their spouse loved, on the night they used to make it. Others need to change everything for a while, with new recipes, a new seat, and a new time, because the old way hurts too much. You can try one and switch to the other later.
It can help to say out loud what you miss. “I miss telling you about my day at supper” is a fair thing to say to an empty kitchen, a friend, or a counselor. If the grief feels raw, widowhood is written for losing a spouse or partner, and after a loss covers grief more broadly.
Inviting someone to eat with you
Sharing a meal is one of the oldest ways people keep each other company, and it doesn’t have to be fancy. A pot of soup and a loaf of bread is plenty. What people remember is being asked.
Start small and specific. You could say to a neighbor, “I made too much chili. Would you like to come over Thursday at six and help me eat it?” You could ask a friend who also lives alone whether they’d like to trade suppers, with you cooking one week and them cooking the next. Some people set up a standing soup night once a month for three or four neighbors, where everyone brings bread or a salad and nobody has to do much.
If having people over feels like too much, meet somewhere instead. A weekly lunch at the same diner with the same friend gives you a meal you share and a date to look forward to. Lunch is often easier to arrange than supper, because people are already out and the day isn’t over yet.
Some invitations will get a no, or a “maybe another time” that never comes. That says more about the other person’s week than about you. Ask someone else, or ask the same person again in a month. No page can promise that a particular person will say yes, and this site only works on your side of the table: your nerve, your plan, and the kind way you talk to yourself after a no.
If a meal by phone is all you can manage, that counts too. Call a sibling or an old friend at suppertime and eat together on the phone or on a video call. Plenty of families who live far apart do this every week.
If making new friends is the larger worry, read wanting a friend at 70.
Community meals and eating out on your own
There are more shared tables in most towns than people realize. Many senior centers serve a hot lunch on weekdays, often for a small suggested donation, and you eat at long tables with the same people week after week. Places of worship hold potlucks and church suppers that welcome newcomers. Some libraries, community centers, and service clubs host monthly community dinners open to anyone.
The first visit is usually the hardest. Go with the plan of eating the meal and saying hello to one person, and nothing more. If it’s awkward the first time, try it twice more before you decide. Regulars tend to notice a new face by the third week, and a nod across the table can turn into a seat saved for you.
Eating out on your own is easier at some places than others. A diner counter, a café with small tables, or the bar seating at a family restaurant all suit one person. Bring a book or the paper if it helps you feel at ease. Early suppers and weekday lunches tend to be less crowded and less loud. Many people who dread eating out alone find that the second or third time feels ordinary, and a friendly server who learns your order can be a small bright spot in the week.
If you can only manage one shared meal a week, make it the main meal of the day, at noon, with other people around. Then a simpler supper at home in the evening doesn’t have to carry the whole weight of the day’s company.
When appetite changes
Loneliness can change how you eat, and so can grief, low mood, health problems, and some medicines. Talk with your doctor if you’ve lost weight without trying, if you often don’t feel hungry, if food tastes wrong or bland, or if chewing or swallowing has become hard. Tell them too if you’re eating far more than usual, or if a drink or two with supper has turned into more.
A change in appetite that lasts two weeks or more, along with a low mood, a loss of interest in hobbies and people you used to enjoy, or sleep that’s off, can be a sign of depression. Depression is a medical condition, and it is treatable. The depression room explains more.
If you take any prescribed medicine, keep taking it as prescribed. Some medicines are meant to be taken with food, so a skipped supper can matter; follow the label, and ask your pharmacist or doctor if you’re not sure. Never stop or change a medicine because your appetite has changed. Bring the change to the doctor who prescribed it.
Common questions
Is it bad to eat alone every night?
Eating alone every night isn’t harmful on its own, and many people enjoy a calm supper alone. It becomes a problem when meals get skipped or rushed, when supper is eaten standing over the sink, or when the hour brings on a lonely feeling most nights. Setting a place at the table, keeping a regular suppertime, and sharing a meal with other people once a week or so usually help. If you’ve also lost interest in food, lost weight without trying, or felt low for two weeks or more, talk with your doctor.
Why do I feel lonelier at dinnertime than the rest of the day?
For years, supper may have been the meal you shared with a spouse, children, or roommates, and it was the time everyone talked about their day. Your body and your habits remember that routine, so the empty table stands out more at six o’clock than at 10 in the morning. The day’s errands and appointments are also usually over by then. Many people find it helps to put a phone call, a radio program, or a book at the table, and to see people earlier in the day so the evening isn’t the only chance for company.
How do I make cooking for one easier?
Cook once and eat twice by making a pot of soup, stew, or chili and freezing the extra in one-serving portions. Buy small amounts at the deli and meat counters, and keep frozen vegetables, eggs, canned beans, rice, and pasta on hand. Keep a short list of easy suppers for tired nights, like eggs on toast or a baked potato with cheese. If shopping or cooking has become hard because of your health, the Eldercare Locator at 1-800-677-1116 can point you to home-delivered meal programs in your area.
Is it weird to eat at a restaurant alone?
Plenty of people eat out alone, and most restaurant staff are used to it. A diner counter, a café, or bar seating at a family restaurant are comfortable spots for one person. Going at a less busy time, like an early supper or a weekday lunch, makes it easier, and bringing a book or the newspaper gives your hands and eyes an easy place to rest. The first time can feel awkward. By the third visit to the same place, it usually feels ordinary, and a server who remembers your order makes it feel friendlier.
Where can I find a community meal near me?
Many senior centers serve a weekday lunch, often for a small suggested donation, and places of worship, libraries, community centers, and service clubs often hold potlucks or monthly community dinners. Your local Area Agency on Aging, which you can find through the Eldercare Locator at 1-800-677-1116, can tell you about group meal programs nearby. A place of worship’s bulletin or the library’s notice board is another good place to look. Go once with the plan of eating and saying hello to one person, and give it three visits before you decide.
Learn more from trusted sources
These public health agencies explain social connection and low mood in more detail than this site does.
- Tips for staying connected from the National Institute on Aging lists practical ways to see and hear from people more often, including shared activities like meals.
- Social connection from the CDC explains why time with other people matters for your health.
- Depression and older adults from the National Institute on Aging describes signs of depression, including changes in appetite, and how it is treated.
If you need care
If you’re in crisis in the United States, call or text 988 now, before you read any further. You don’t need a good reason or the right words. If you’re outside the United States, call your local emergency number or a local crisis line. A real person can stay on the line with you.
If you’re not in crisis but suppers alone have come with a heavier feeling, like a flat mood most days, an appetite that has slipped away, or a sense that tomorrow has shrunk, tell your doctor. Keep any prescribed medicine as prescribed until you’ve talked it over together. There’s more in the loneliness room and its questions and answers, short definitions in the glossary (including loneliness), and short answers in the FAQ. This page is not yet medically reviewed.